Relationships are complicated. I really wish they weren’t. Recently CJ learned that sometimes friends can change on you, for seemingly no apparent reason. Sure it is easy to say, “well maybe they weren’t a true friend after all” but really that doesn’t take away a child’s sadness.
Luckily at his age children tend to rebound, but he is learning a very valuable, albeit unpleasant, lesson about life. As we talked about his recent experience, I suggested that he continue to be nice to this child but also to seek out different friendships. While I was counseling him I started to listen to what I was telling him. Pausing, I realized that I should really heed my own advice.
Recently a friend whom I had begun to trust and rely on started to change towards me. It has not been totally consistent, but there is definitely something different. As this has been unfolding all the self-doubt and insecurities that I had as a little girl have begun to rise up again. But wait, I am the “grown-up” I should be able to have “big girl” discussions with adults and “work through” issues, right? While all of these things are true, I am still figuring out how to best approach this. Although I will address the issue, or perhaps non-issue, I also have realized that even a “big girl” needs to be reminded that sometimes people just have issues and you simply can’t take it personally.