just a mom figuring it out one day at a time

In the Back Seat

As mothers we are the go to people. We are the ones who manage and balance it all. Work, schedules, kids’ activities and then provide all the home and emotional balance necessary for this little familial universe to exist. Yet the funny thing is as much as we are in charge, we also put ourselves in the back seat. More often than not we sacrifice for our kids, our family… but at what cost?

Tonight I was invited by a friend to a gathering of women for a jewelry party. I did not know anyone but the host and as I talked to the various women at the party, I was once again profoundly aware of how much we sacrifice of ourselves for the greater good of our families. As stories were shared, perhaps a bit more free flowing because of the wine, I was taken aback at the amount of sacrifice that these women had endured. Several had fought cancer, some extramarital affairs and others fought just losing themselves in the monotony of everyday life.

Although my children are not grown, and I have not had cancer or some of the many things mentioned tonight I have to wonder how to balance that conditioned response of taking the “back seat.” Although our children, relationships and work are important so is the very essence of who we are and what we are about. If we constantly put ourselves second, and don’t make time to nurture ourselves then what is left?

Tonight I stayed longer than I anticipated and will probably be overly tired tomorrow. However, I enjoyed myself, reclaimed a little bit of me and a yes I admit a little bit of jewelry as well. Like any exercise, I think I just need a little practice.

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